THE INSANITY CONTINUES

How many times can you object to a planning application?

Well, if you happen to be the Lenches' resident Dr Goebbels, as many times as you like, apparently.

You can object as yourself, and as the self-appointed leader of a bunch of disruptive, conniving, ill-disciplined, vicious and arrogant liars (VVASP, as in "Does Anything Eat VVASPs?"), and as the Lord High President of a Tennis Club, in which case your arguments against the proposed Lenchwick Windfarm will be truly stupid (Dr Fraud seems to think that it will be "impossible" to serve in the direction of the Malvern Hills with a turbine some way off to the side - so, what do we think? Deranged, dishonest or desperate? You decide.)

Then again, if you are a parish councillor in Church Lench (one of the single-issue hoodlums who took over the parish council after the responsible parish councillors were forced out by Fraud's howler monkeys), you too can object on the silliest grounds imaginable. Such as your son occasionally comes up from London and would be distressed by having a windfarm in the middle distance (listen, love - if he can survive London, he'll cope with a windfarm not very nearby).

But the prize for Stupidest Objection to a Sensible Scheme must surely go to the maddest objection of all - that, somehow or other, the turbines will affect trout in some lakes thanks to "ground vibration". Now, I mean, come on - why not find out whether that has ever happened, anywhere, before making the world's daftest objection on that basis? Why not grow up and do some proper finding out, rather than listening to the mad, self-important liar of Evesham Road?

One hysterical objection involves the removal of a hedge to allow the vehicles carrying the turbine parts to reach their destination. Somebody ought to point out that the protesters of VVASP have form themselves when it comes to removing hedgerows, the only difference being that Scottish Power are open and upfront about it, while the cretin mob remove hedges and then apply, retrospectively, for planning permission to do so.

Perhaps the saddest objection comes from a resident who feels that ScottishPower Renewables' plans for a windfarm have torn the community apart. Well, no, that's not what's happened. Any community capable of behaving like certain Lench folk have isn't a proper community at all. The plans for Lenchwick Windfarm have simply exposed the nutters, halfwits and weirdos who now occupy much of the area as the selfish and arrogant bullies they really are.

And, as if to prove how dangerously self-obsessed some of these subhuman protesters are, they are now planning ways of disrupting the dummy run of the trucks which will, all being well, deliver the windfarm to us in due course. A few weeks from now, SPR will try out a couple of the potential routes the mega-trucks will eventually take to get to the site of the proposed windfarm.

What this means is that every nutter in the Lenches who simply can't keep things in perspective (not everybody, of course, but just the noisy, nasty Nazis of VVASP) is trying to organise roadblocks of pensioners and idiot yahoos on horses to get in the way of the truck.

How stupid, stupid, stupid can you get??

Of course, behind this mindless frenzy is the evil mastermind that is Dr Rod. He is really the only person who stands to lose anything at all when the windfarm is built, because he has lied so much, so consistently, about the turbines that his reputation will be shattered into a billion pieces when they become operational and we all discover just how quiet and harmless a modern windfarm really is.

Having made his foolish, self-centred stand with every intention of dragging the villagers behind him, he alone will be shown to have lied his head off to everybody when the windfarm is up and running. No one else stands to lose - only him. And that is as it should be.

Still, not that many objections to the windfarm have been received by Wychavon, while quite a surprising number of supportive comments have been submitted. And okay, so jobs are being lost by those who have dared to voice a perfectly reasonable opinion. But then, things like this are bound to separate the honest individuals from the spivs and the democrats from the fascists. No, the fact is that support for Dr Fraud's madness is slipping, in spite of the manic frenzy of dishonesty which he and his clones have indulged themselves in.

So there's good news there. And good news, too, that the planning committee at Wychavon aren't anywhere as stupid as the dupes of VVASP. And good news that the anti brigade are a bunch of cowards, happy to sack employees for having an opinion but far too self-obsessed and thoughtless to cause any real disruption when the truck comes through the village.

Thank heaven the battle is nearly over. And, by any reasonable standards, VVASP have lost.