TRUMPTON

Why are VVASP like Donald Trump?

You weren't expecting that one, were you? But there are surprising similarities.

According to the Scottish Daily Express, Donald Trump has vowed 'vehemently' to oppose an offshore windfarm in Aberdeenshire because it will spoil his sea-view.

The funny-haired one has, as we know, bulldozered through plans for a golf course on the Aberdeenshire coast. This was in the face of considerable local opposition. Now, Trumpy's getting all upset at the thought of having to share the area.

Eleven 165-metre offshore turbines are planned (originally, there were to be thirty-three). And, whereas inland numpties of the VVASP school insist that windfarms should only be built offshore, Trump is trying to fight this particular one on the grounds that 'Every component of our project is based upon sea views.'

He goes on: 'We cannot allow the construction of what is tantamount to 11 65-storey structures off our beautiful coastline ... These turbines, if ever built, will in one fell swoop destroy Scotland's magnificent heritage.'

If you haven't already fallen out of your chair, take another look at that last sentence. Trump, it appears, is allowed to destroy Scotland's magnificent heritage by ruining a site of special scientific interest (dumping a golf course, etc., on it). But any scheme of benefit to the entire country (a windfarm) must be opposed.

As one of Trump's main opponents - David Milne, who is refusing to sell his property to allow Trump to go stomping all over the scenery - has said of the businessman: 'He is an arrogant idiot.'

In other words, he's an anti-windfarm campaigner.

Two-faced or what? Yep. But Trump has more in common with the hypocrites of VVASP than just a shallow and self-interested opposition to a much-needed and beneficial development.

We could start with the Scottish angle. One local nimby has been heard repeatedly bemoaning the fact that ScottishPower Renewables 'aren't even Scottish'. Okay, so the parent company is Spanish, but SPR do at least operate out of offices in Glasgow. Besides which, this fool seems to be suggesting that, if ScottishPower Renewables were completely and indisputably Scottish, the Lenchwick Windfarm project would be fine. But they're owned by a Spanish company, so they must be opposed (?!?*%**!!???).

The problem with Nimby Central (Church Lench) is that it had already been split before the windfarm was even mentioned. Talking to those in the area who support the Lenchwick Windfarm (but who do so quietly, so as not to stir the attack dogs of VVASP), one thing stands out. This whole windfarm hoo-hah actually started much earlier, when a bunch of villagers (mostly newcomers) decided that what everyone really wanted was a sports club.

Actually, a substantial proportion of the village did not want a sports club. But the sports people went ahead regardless. And a fair few locals have suffered. The sports people are amazingly noisy, creating more than just light pollution - they seem incapable of playing football without swearing loudly and constantly, much to the annoyance of the neighbours (who have been there a lot longer than the sports people). Having created their very own blot on the landscape, the sports club has proceeded to tear out another hedgerow, only retrospectively applying for planning permission to do so, in order to extend the nuisance that is their facility.

No surprises, then, when we find out that the heart of VVASP's dishonest nimby protest is ... the sports club!! And that many of those who don't have a problem at all with the windfarm do have a problem with the sports club that was dumped on them by an arrogant group of arrivistes. The windfarm issue is almost by-the-bye. The village still hasn't recovered from the vandalism of the sporty types and their tendency to dictate what can and cannot happen in the village.

So Trump, forcing Scotland to accept his gross vision of a golf club where one is neither needed or wanted, and then banging on about a windfarm which will 'spoil' his views, turns out to have everything in common with VVASP. They, too, forced the village to accept a sports club, riding roughshod over local opinion, and then threw together a completely outrageous anti-windfarm campaign on the grounds that it would 'spoil' their views.

Maybe, folks - maybe this brings us to the very heart of the anti-windfarm movement in the UK. It is engineered and sustained by arrogance. By the sort of person who imposes their will on their neighbours, completely ignoring local opinion, and then seeks to fight a perfectly sensible, beneficial and, indeed, vital development because they don't like it.

Yep - arrogant hypocrisy. That's VVASP in a nutshell.